Self-Worth: Money Metaphors

I was thinking today about all the ways in which money (in turn, consumerism and capitalism) pervade our words, and thus our worlds.


Think about the simple term "self-worth." As soon as we attach the word "worth," deeply encoded in our mind, we have now made the connection between our self to money, what we feel our value is worth - our bang for the buck so to speak.


It may be challenging follow this logic initially, but the search for clarity involves a slow reduction and an acute reflection of all parts of the whole. George Lakoff in The Metaphors We Live By reminds us:


The concepts that govern our thought are not just matters of the intellect. They also govern our everyday functioning, down to the most mundane details. Our concepts structure what we perceive, how we get around in the world, and how we relate to other people. Our conceptual system thus plays a central role in defining our everyday realities (AND OUR SELVES). If we are right in suggesting that our conceptual system is largely metaphorical, then the way we think, what we experience, and what we do every day is very much a matter of metaphor. But our conceptual system is not something we are normally aware of. In most of the little things we do every day, we simply think and act more or less automatically along certain lines. Just what these lines are is by no means obvious. One way to find out is by looking at language. 


For me, using monetary associations in determining how we define ourselves actually limits us by identifying our intrinsic behavior as something to be governed by profit and loss. For instance, we might keep score in our relationship thinking we "owe" people time or they are in "debt" to us because we did something for them.  We might likewise feel an absence of power or confidence because we are not earning the dollar amount we feel we deserve or we might demand a certain amount in exchange for our esteemed services.


This way of defining ourselves only highlights our fear that we may lack or will lose some essential quality we need to survive when dealing with other people. Wouldn't it be truly liberating to say yes to a commitment because we open our hearts to love or even no to something because it is in the spirit of self-conservation or self-love? Ultimately, using money metaphors when thinking about our abilities, we are not being compassionate with ourselves, and thus cannot recognize compassion in others.  Indebting ourselves with this concept, we don't live fully because we are stripped of free will and our altruistic generosity is blocked. Would you rather live in a world where people are valued for our intrinsic ability to show love or live in a world where people are concerned only with selfish acquisition of things you also need in order to survive?


Instead of using the word "self-worth," maybe next time use "self-essence." I'm not sure "essence" is right either except it defines an abstract quality that determines a person's character. At the root of that "essence" is a connection to others, gratitude for all the love we contain, and fulfillment in our being that is never ending and renewable. Reminding ourselves of our self-essence, we constantly highlight our loving nature, which lacks nothing, which needs to buy nothing in order to feel complete. We are complete already - we were worthy the day we were born.