Finally,
brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is
excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. – Philippians 4:8
It seems
that when it comes to seeking answers, the words of Bible is the best
place to start for some. It can provide hope, redemption, and peace - and as
much as one would like to claim it inspires the utmost faith, the words I have read in it has not done
so for me. And the impasse is almost unbearable.
When I
think about women and religion, there are so many questions, yet my heart and
mind connect on one thing – some churches do not allow equality for women.
I picked
up my Bible and read it cover to cover over the past two days. I have numerous
articles on why or why not 1 Tim. 2:11-12 is accurate (this is the most common
scripture used to justify women’s submission in the church).
Indeed,
during times of changing culture, many Christians remind us this world does not
matter and not to get caught up in this world as it is a sin; not to want too much because it's a sin; not to question God's accuracy for the Holy Spirit
guides us in its understanding; to rejoice in God's natural order and not to
worry about these cultural issues as they distract us from our real duty of
living as Christ did or from delivering Christ's message; and ultimately,
biblical order is vital for understanding God:
"God
created manhood, womanhood, marriage and sex because He wanted us to have
symbols, images, and language powerful enough to convey the idea of who He is
and what a relationship with Him is all about. Without manhood, womanhood,
marriage and sex, we would have a tough time understanding concepts such as
desire, love, commitment, fidelity, infidelity, loyalty, jealousy, unity,
intimacy, marriage, oneness, covenant, and family."
"Sin
inclines men toward a worldly love of power or an abdication of spiritual
responsibility, and inclines women to resist limitations on their roles or to
neglect the use of their gifts in appropriate ministries."
"The
question is do we have the humility to trust in that way when
it doesn't make sense to us? There is a trust in God's goodness and
perfect will that comes into play. Gender-bending – and all of its
cultural manifestations – is the subtle symptom of an outright rebellion."
"The
Holy Spirit, for his part, was to glorify Christ. If God gives me, as a
woman, a task, that is the place and position from which he wants me
to glorify him. I have noticed that when I desire to be submissive
to the Lord, he has a way of letting me know what is in my heart in relation to
my husband."
"However,
if God gives a woman leadership abilities, he will most likely give her a realm
in which to exercise them for his glory. (See Proverbs 31 for some
ideas.) How about leading her children? A mother may and must lead
her children, but, even there, she is still to be in a position of submission
to her husband. How about leading other women? The apostle Paul
spells out very clearly that the older women should teach the younger
ones. (What he tells them to teach the younger women is also worth
pondering.) Here is a built-in, significant role for every Christian
woman! Thus, a wife's stronger personality does not indicate she is free
to be the head in the marriage; neither can it be used as an excuse for the
husband to abdicate his God-given position. Even so, I dare to say that
the presence of gifts or talents does not necessarily mean we will always have
a realm in which to exercise them. We may be called on to relinquish them
for a time, even to die to them or to the way in which we thought we
were to use them. It may be that God is after my humility more than my
gifts."
In order
to bring clarity to believers, The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood is
a widely used source. The above statements were found through their Web site.
Their mission includes "to help the church defend against the
accommodation of secular feminism. At this time many evangelicals were
beginning to experiment with an ideology that would later become known as
evangelical feminism. This was a significant departure from what the church had
practiced from its beginning regarding the role of men and women in the home
and local church."
I am not
picking on them. It appears this organization is what many others seem to point
at in justifying their stance on this issue of female roles in church.
I am of
the mindset that we have God in all our hearts. If we want to search for
answers, we need to look no farther than to our heart. How can it be that if we
are all created in God's image, why can I not trust myself for the answer I
seek? For me, this idea of examining my life fits perfectly with the idea
of the noble pursuit of searching for my personal truth: “Ask, and it shall be
given you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” –
Mathew 7:7.
For me,
these last few weeks have been hell as I try to find my way through all this. I
have read many books/articles including The Case for Christ,
ReligiousTolerance.org, Evolving in Monkey Town, Love Wins, Insurrection, and
Mere Christianity.
I deeply
believe it is only through questioning our values, beliefs, and assertions that
we become authentic, faithful to ourselves; likewise, we become faithful to our
highest purpose - exercising mindful awareness: giving full attention to
the present moment with acceptance; experiencing grace
through self-kindness: treating yourself with care instead of beating
yourself up; and connecting with others on the basis of common humanity:
the understanding that sometimes suffering is part of the human experience
& we are not alone in it. While some of you may be shocked that my
life purpose isn’t to serve God, I do want to be clear that LOVE is the answer
for me. I may not classify it as God but it serves the same purpose – my life
is driven by it. Peter Rollins, author of Insurrection, reminds us:
When
God is treated as an object that we love, then we always experience a distance
between ourselves and the ultimate source of happiness and meaning. But when
God is found in love itself, then the very act of loving brings us into
immediate relationship with the deepest truth of all…God no longer pulls on us
as something “out there”; rather God is a presence that is made manifest in our
very midst. Here meaning is not found in turning away from the world but in
fully embracing it through the act of love.
It is
through this act of love that I went on this search. So many times I have seen
men and women alike unquestionably highlight the submissive role demanded of women. For me, to use my brain, my heart, my ability to question
everything means love – love for myself and love for others as I am doing the
work they are sometimes overwhelmed to do.
People have misused scriptures in order to keep people from questioning authority and questioning those in power in the
church under the guise of God’s commandments, especially denying women this right since they are to be silent.
And how do we stop people without
the power questioning those with the power: convince them they don’t have power
in the first place.
And this
is where we start with women in the church. In my search, I noticed that women
are usually divided into two categories: they are either idealistically
highlighted as Mother Marys or stigmatized as seducing Eves. They are
either scripted as an unselfish mother or a tempting woman distracting men from
the church.
Do these
roles translate to responsibility or power in the church? Can a woman who gave
birth be more aligned to God? If so, why isn’t she offered more leadership
roles and ample opportunity to shed light for others on how this relationship brought her closer
to God? This shows to me the mother relationship is honored as long as it keeps
her busy and diverted from the real work of leading the congregation in
service. I know plenty of women who lead a household of four children, and two
dogs, gracefully and respectfully, yet because she is a woman, her
leadership capabilities must be restricted to the childcare duties and go
unrecognized as an asset to the leadership mission of the church.
What a
benefit she may serve as a spiritual leader to all – not just the women’s
ministry or children’s ministry but to the whole congregation. What a benefit she is to engage
her children’s minds, to facilitate growth, and to teach her children how to
relate to others in a loving way, respecting diversity of opinion.
And where is the line that we should tell our sons to start being a leader even though his mother has led him for most of his life? When does he need to recognize because he is a man, he needs to lead his female mother now? What a tricky place for many sons - How do they honor the upbringing their mothers have given them but also have it somewhere in the back of their mind that this mother is also a female and must be designated to a lower status in the church as a thing not powerful enough to know the way to Christ on her own?
And where is the line that we should tell our sons to start being a leader even though his mother has led him for most of his life? When does he need to recognize because he is a man, he needs to lead his female mother now? What a tricky place for many sons - How do they honor the upbringing their mothers have given them but also have it somewhere in the back of their mind that this mother is also a female and must be designated to a lower status in the church as a thing not powerful enough to know the way to Christ on her own?
And if
we aren’t a mother, we are to be out of disregarded because we are more closely aligned
with Satan and the desires of the flesh. I am so tired of men blaming women for men’s lack of sexual
integrity. It is a woman’s fault for being beautiful or distracting. It’s easier to blame someone else that they tempted you instead of
analyzing your own weakness. There are indeed women out there that think sexual
attention is power and definitely use this to their advantage, but that
wouldn’t be an issue if this Eve connotation weren’t in place. Instead of
teaching men women aren’t evil and tempting, we are actually telling women and
men due to this saint/whore dichotomy that these are the only two roles for
women to be, and thus, there are only two ways for men to treat women. The
easiest way to prevent sexual disgrace is to have women blocked from
sight, blocked from value, blocked from power because they may tempt men in
power (The military used to use this as their ammo when women came knocking on
their doors). Women need to be respected as valuable human beings regardless if
their biological parts work or not, regardless if they represent a threat to
the status quo. Are we getting these messages from the pulpit?
Instead
of allowing real power – power as an expandable resource that is produced
and shared through interaction by leaders and followers alike - we are given an illusionary title
as mothers that, in effect, do not involve shared power in building our local
communities or families. This concept of giving a noble title but not having
any real influence is another tactic to reduce women’s status. We did
this when we were kids - magnifying the greatness of someone else's toy as a
distraction method so they won't want to play with our toy: "Your
superhero has a long cape – that must be a cool dude to fly around – my dude only came with a helicopter." If we only focus on the reproductive
ability of women as the prime channel for them to be closer to God, women aren't having a role in a the building of a ministry or community. Those in
power, those who make rules, who decide the fate of all, due to this fake out, maintain power.
Likewise,
there a psychological way we learn: constructed knowledge. We build our beliefs and values
around gaps that we sometimes can’t fill in – we don’t pay attention to the
gaps because the overall system gives us enough meaning to get by –
consequently we presume over those gaps. If I were to illustrate this idea to you, I would
ask you to remember a list of words as I say them aloud: tired, bed, pillow,
snooze, blanket, etc. Then, I would ask you to write them down. People get
close to writing them all down but they always add one: sleep – which isn’t on
the list. All the words singularly may be effective in providing a larger concept - like nighttime or sleep or nap or rest, yet taken as a whole, we build over the gaps to a patterned, constructed meaning, and that meaning shifts according to our individual experiences. We build up a concept because it fits a pattern instead of allowing a meaning to naturally manifest.
This effect can be witnessed in respect to the roles of women in the church. If women are to be submissive and quiet, you may infer women might not have anything important to say or they aren’t powerful enough to listen to. Even if you have the best intentions and want shared power in your relationships, you might subconsciously have the assumption women are not worthy in your mind because of this proven psychological mode of learning and that one scripture constantly is highlighted. Would we have this idea about women without this weight on ONE SCRIPTURE and unjust interpretations of the Bible?
This effect can be witnessed in respect to the roles of women in the church. If women are to be submissive and quiet, you may infer women might not have anything important to say or they aren’t powerful enough to listen to. Even if you have the best intentions and want shared power in your relationships, you might subconsciously have the assumption women are not worthy in your mind because of this proven psychological mode of learning and that one scripture constantly is highlighted. Would we have this idea about women without this weight on ONE SCRIPTURE and unjust interpretations of the Bible?
As I
look around, I see what a blessing it is to have women leaders in all areas of
life:
Having
women in business is profitable -
"[T]here
is increasing evidence that companies with more than three women on their board
have a higher return on investment...This does not mean women are better than
men, or would be better corporate board directors than men; rather it means
they are different—and tend to bring what can be termed 'added value' to a
corporate board. This is because they ask different questions, are concerned
about process, and tend to complement the attributes of their male colleagues...The
'terrible truth' is the growing knowledge that women tend to exhibit different
leadership attributes than men, not better or worse, merely different. They
tend to be holistic rather than linear thinkers, they tend to negotiate in a
win/win rather than a win/lose manner, they tend to be sensitive to subliminal
cues, and comfortable with ambiguity. Sometimes male attributes are needed and
sometimes female attributes are needed. However, in today’s fast changing
global environment, which is culturally diverse, and characterized by
ubiquitous social, political, and economic uncertainty, female attributes
represent 'added value.'"
Having
women in sports is entertaining (and makes colleges money) -
Regarding
2011 Women's NCAA Championship between Texas A & M and Notre Dame
- "Christine Brennan crunched some numbers:
Consider
that just 94 points were scored in Connecticut's ugly victory against Butler on
Monday. But the women? They reached 94 with 14:25 to go in their game, then
added 52 more. Combined, the men shot 26% in their title game. The women, 50%.
It's
not fair to judge the two games against each other, but that's certainly nothing
new for women's hoops. It just so happens that this is one of the first times
the comparisons favor the women. It was the first time no 1-seeds made the
title game since 1994, and instead of chalk, the women's tournament got some
refreshing parity, a few big name stars, and a classic final that we'll
remember for a long time. And, for once, a much more entertaining game than the
men's side."
Having
women in health care benefits both the individual patient and the world -
"An
increasing number of women actually want to be General Practitioners at
graduation, which must be better than having failed male specialists
making up the bulk of the vocational training intake. Consultations with women
doctors have been shown to be more patient centered and informative than with
male physicians, and equally satisfactory for both male and female
patients in primary care. Women are more likely to work with marginalized
and vulnerable communities and to be a major source of clinical input to
maternal and child health (a WHO and UN priority). The inclusion of women as
equal partners in society is recognized as a key determinant of health and
development by WHO, and more women in the work environment may increase
emotional supportiveness, and team working for both staff and patients.
However, it may be that we could get more out of our women doctors if residual
prejudices and barriers did not continue to impede their performance and
contribution."
Having
women in the military is an asset -
"White,
like other female soldiers working with special operations teams, was brought
in to do things that would be awkward or impossible for her male teammates.
Frisking burka-clad women, for example.
Her
death, in a bomb explosion in the Taliban heartland of Kandahar, underscores
the risks of placing women with elite U.S. special operations teams working in remote
villages.
Military
leaders and other female soldiers in the program say its rewards are great,
even as it fuels debate over the roles of women in combat.
"We
could do things that the males cannot do, and they are starting to realize
that," says Sgt. Christine Baldwin, who, like White, was in one of the
first groups of women deployed to Afghanistan this year as specially trained
"cultural support" troops.
Male
soldiers often cannot even speak to an Afghan woman because of the strict
cultural norms that separate the sexes and the tradition of women remaining
behind closed doors most of the time. Forcing the issue has yielded only
resentment, military officials say, and has jeopardized the trust and
cooperation of villagers."
These
are just a few examples of how increasing women's roles in the world benefit us
all. But why don't more churches have more spiritual leadership roles for women?
1 Timothy
2:11-12 states, “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do
not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be
quiet” (see the many ways to interpret this here as I there are many articles on this
scripture alone).
Yet
instead of unifying this with other scriptures that want the same things for
both men and women, this scripture – THE ONLY ONE IN THE BIBLE ABOUT THE ROLE
FOR A WOMAN – is used as a way of finding difference instead of unity –
diversion instead of connection – discord instead of love.
Doesn’t
God want humility, submission, and obedience from a man as well:
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the
earth. – Matthew 5:5.
Have
confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep
watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work
will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you– Hebrews
13:17.
Have
this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was
in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but
made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness
of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient
to the point of death, even death on a cross. – Philippians 2: 5-8.
But we
could play scriptural battleship all day and get nowhere. The only true power
comes from our choice. For me, my heart, my mind, and my belief in love are at
peace because I know what is true for me.
Throughout
this search, I keep returning to how language is used, how knowledge is
constructed, and all the ways my heart shouts out that I am worthy of sharing
my spiritual gifts with others too.
In
closing, I am reminded of an article I came across about the power of language and how a monopoly on terms can be used as a way of silencing -
From
"The Ways of
Silencing":
It is possible to silence people by denying them access to the vocabulary to express their claims. One of the best investigations of propaganda was presented by Victor Klemperer, in his book “The Language of the Third Reich.” The data for Klemperer’s claims was the language used by the Third Reich. But the points he makes are applicable to propaganda in the service of much more mundane endeavors, be it to pass health care reform or to increase or decrease taxes. The use of propaganda is not limited to a single political affiliation or intent.
As Klemperer writes in “The Language of the Third Reich,” propaganda “changes the value of words and the frequency of their occurrence … it commandeers for the party that which was previously common property and in the process steeps words and groups of words and sentence structures in its poison.” When writing these words, Klemperer was thinking of the incessant use of the term “heroisch” (“heroic”) to justify the military adventures of the National Socialist state. Obviously, the mechanism described by Klemperer is not used for such odious purposes today.Nevertheless, there has been a similar appropriation of the term “freedom” in American political discourse.
Most would agree that heroism and freedom are fundamentally good things. But the terms “heroisch” and “freedom” have been appropriated for purposes that do not have much connection with the virtues of their original meanings. Whatever one thinks of the wisdom of the 2003 invasion of Iraq, it is difficult to have a reasoned debate about its costs and benefits when the invasion itself is called “Operation Iraqi Freedom.” Similarly, whatever one thinks of tax-cuts, or the estate tax, it is difficult to engage in reasoned debate when they have been respectively relabeled “tax relief” and “the death tax.” It is difficult to have a reasoned debate about the costs and benefits of a policy when one side has seized control of the linguistic means to express all the positive claims. It is easy to say “a tax cut is not always good policy,” but considerably more difficult to say “tax relief is not always good policy,” even though “tax relief” is just a phrase invented to mean the same as “tax cut."
Silencing is only one kind of propaganda. In silencing, one removes the ability of a target person or group to communicate... However, I do think that given our current environment — of oppression, revolution, intervention, war, pseudo-war and ever-present human power relations — it is worthwhile bearing in mind the dangers of the manipulation of language. What may begin as a temporary method to circumvent reasoned discussion and debate for the sake of a prized political goal may very well end up permanently undermining the trust required for its existence.
Misappropriating
the word "authority" or "biblical womanhood" in church
contexts this same way has made it ever illusive for women to achieve any real authority, status, or responsibility, and ultimately, silences us, for it does not
allow sincere opportunity to question or search for our place in the church and keeps us forever ancillary regardless of our spiritual gifts and leadership opportunities. Wherever it is
expressed, this idealization of "biblical womanhood" or even
“motherhood” in speech operates as compensation for inferiority of status. The
more woman is exemplified in speech, the more she is marginalized in practice
and in responsibility. Using these terms as a mask for subjugation is wrong, and ultimately, it weakens her faith in her capabilities and ultimately the church.
This doesn’t make religion bad or make those who accept long-established beliefs at face value less passionate, but rather makes freedom of religion more important and an examined life that shows reverence to something higher than ourselves - truth, goodness, and most importantly, love - vital.
I praise and honor all the women who work within this limiting structure to
change it from the inside by example - those amazing religious teachers,
scholars, and connectors that may not have the title of pastor, but do the same
work.
The
church is a living, breathing thing, just as much as the individuals who make
up it. Love is an action and a commitment to something higher than one's own
preferences or one's own fulfillment. The more you are in possession of love, the more you can spread it. For me, the ideal of love changes from self-sacrifice to self-assertion - without works, faith is dead.
Let's work more on love than maintaining this defunct inferred social order.
Let's work more on love than maintaining this defunct inferred social order.
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